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AroundTheBean correspondent Futon presents his Week 16 NFL Power Rankings, laced with expert analysis and a pinch of humor. Football enthusiasts, sound off in the comments section or by tweeting us @AroundTheBean and/or @JPLime.


Give me the 4 teams at the top and then you can have the rest. I really think I could pick teams 5-12 from a hat and you could make a legitimate argument for however it came out. On to the rankings:

1) Patriots (2)- By my count, after Rex Ryan and Philbin get fired, that will be 20 coaches that have combined to coach the other 3 teams in the AFC East since Belichick took over.

2) Seahawks (3)- Buffalo probably deserves complimentary Super Bowl rings if the Seahawks go on to repeat now. I didn’t like these guys chances going into Lambeau but the door to the 1 seed is open. Has anyone figured out what the tiebreakers are involving a Seahawks-Packers-Cowboys if all 3 finish tied at 12-4?

3) Packers (1)- Aaron Rodgers just came back to the NFL MVP field.

4) Broncos (4)- As bad as I thought the Patriots managed the end of the first half- Denver surpassed them by light years.

5) Colts (6)- Here’s a question for you Colts fans- who would you rather face in the 2nd round of the AFC Playoffs. New England at Foxboro or Denver at Mile High. Stick that in your Peyton is better argument and suck it.

6) Cowboys (8)- If a Texas Governor rooted for the Giants he would be hung.

7) Cardinals (5)- Is it wrong that I like 3 potential Wild Card teams over the so-called top seed in the NFC right now this late in the season?

8) Steelers (10)- Leveon Bell, consensus 2015 #1 NFL Fantasy Football pick.

9) Lions (9)- Why is this offense only barely mediocre at this point?

10) Eagles (7)- As bad as Sanchez was- this is really the second game of the year I point to the Eagles secondary singlehandedly losing. I hope they get a commission on Dez Bryant’s contract extension.

11) Bengals (11)- The 1 PM Super Bowl champs continue to roll.

12) Ravens (13)- I was shocked how much of a letdown the Ravens had here given all the former Jaguars on the team

13) Chiefs (15)- Knile Davis and Chris Polk win the Fantasy Vultures Award for 2014 for destroying people in their finals.

14) Bills (18)- The Bills might be the Rams of the AFC. A competent QB away from being a fringe Super Bowl contender

15) Chargers (12)- Boy this offense was bad on Sunday.

16) Rams (14)- Jeff Fischer had some shots fired back at him by Bruce Arians this week and it was awesome.

17) Dolphins (16)- Can’t wait until the Dolphins screw up their coaching search by only firing Philbin and making the new coach take his coordinators

18) Saints (24)- The NFC South has turned into 4 fat chicks at last call in a dive bar. Gotta pick one. And I’ll take the friskiest one.

19) Panthers (23)- Another Cam Newton drive that ended in a turn over.

20) 49ers (17)- It’s a long day livin’ in Reseda
There’s a freeway runnin’ through the yard
And I’m a bad boy, ’cause I don’t even miss her
I’m a bad boy for breakin’ her heart…. SING IT WITH ME NOW

21) Texans (19)- To me this remains the most logical RG3 destination.

22) Vikings (20)- Is it just me or does Teddy Bridgewater feel like Chad Pennington 2.0. And no, that’s not a good thing.

23) Falcons (21)- Can we for the love of God please start to have the ability to review personal fouls?

24) Browns (22)- The Johnny Football era might be shorter than any of us ever thought.

25) Giants (25)- O.D.B.

26) Bears (26)- If you were wondering why you didn’t hear Gruden criticize Trestman or Kromer once, check out Gruden’s 2001 Raiders staff

27) Raiders (27)- Good news out of Oakland- Mark Davis WILL be involved in the coaching negotiations this time.

28) Jets (31)- Rex Ryan gives 0 frigs about a draft pick that he will never get to coach.

29) Bucs (28)- Maybe Lovie can get Trestman to be the O Coordinator in Tampa

30) Jaguars (29)- The Jaguars opened as a regular season favorite for the first time in 42 games this week.

31) Redskins (30)- Stealing this but RG3-11 and is the nickname that keeps giving.

32) Titans (32)- I still wish Wiz had taken the Lions job just to see how he would have done there. Taking the Tennessee job when he could have the majority of the openings was dumb.

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